FAN FICTION: A Day in the Life of Two Princesses

Almost daily Princess Crazy Train and Princess Train Wreck's happiness is thwarted by monsters unimaginable. Suck in their tower of musical business, connected to the outside world only by telepathy (or maybe the internet) and their daily visits by the trolls, witches, and warlocks.

There are at least three trolls who lurk nearby. One's got a penchant for pink velour and a straggly beard. She lurks about the foot of the tower screeching. The second troll is a bumbling bizarre fellow. Sometimes amiable, sometimes lecherous and deviant, our heroines can smell him coming because of the putrid odor of stale smoke. The last troll is the most frightening. Her eyes glow red and her hair is fierce black. Of the trolls, she's the only most likely to cook the girls and eat them.



Sometimes the bog witch visits crackling wildly (though of late, she's been away collecting herbs and eyes of newt for potions). She is friendly to the girls even as the matted tangled mess of hair atop her head is home to various weevils and wasps. Princess Train Wreck is especially disturbed by this witch and Princess Crazy Train does her best to comfort her friend in the face of this somewhat harmless wizened old woman.

It's a lonely life away in their tower. Each princess dreams of her knight, or of maybe lil' schmoopy Todd in advertising, coming to her rescue. Thankfully they have each other. And ale at lunches. And various magic happy pills to ease the malaise.